There was a time, a very long time, when I knew not about this lifestyle. And it seemed that there was always something missing in my relationships. Something that I couldn't quite put my finger on.
A feeling of contentment. No, that's not the right word. This sense of....rightness. A feeling deep down, a feeling of settling. You know the feeling, when you lie down to go to sleep, and you find that perfectly comfortable spot in the bed....your legs just right, your head on the corner of your pillow. And you take that deep sigh, and settle into your perfect breathing rhythm. Your mind drifting...not really thinking of any one thing in particular. And without even thinking about it, you know, at that exact moment, sleep is coming. That's what I mean by settling. In that space and time, everything is just right.
That sensation flows throughout a wonderful relationship, knowing everything is just right, you are where you belong, you are "settled".
Whether it's his voice, telling you "good girl", or his hand resting on the back of your neck, his thumb caressing your cheek, or his lips against your ear as he tells you "you belong to me", that feeling draws down your body, through your mind, and you are just there.
I miss that.